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Yessir, Yessir, Three Bags Full

The American Congress Of Think Tanks has proclaimed June a National Month For Idle Contemplation.

What an ideal time to announce the formation of a new special interest group: The Arizona Woolgatherers Association.

If you like to sit and daydream, or idly contemplate the mysteries of life, you’re a candidate for membership. Subscribers to The Journal Of Prevarication are automatically enrolled.

The Woolgatherers Association is under the umbrella of The Wickenburg Institute For Factual Diversity. WIFD, a think tank for liars, is already the parent of The Hearsay Trust, plus our support group for people who can’t make decisions; we …

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They're Gone

Well, they’re gone again.

In case you’re not from Wickenburg and don’t know what Wickenburg is all about, I’m referring to the “Snowbirds,” or what the politically correct here in town prefer to call “Winter Visitors.”

They start arriving in November and, by the second week in January, are all in town. They live mostly in the 55+ communities and condos like Frontier Village (conveniently located near Basha’s, where they prefer to shop), although some of the more well-to-do retirees have homes in the same neighborhoods the rest of us live in. A few of the very well-to-do folks inhabit …

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How the Banjo Won the West

You thought cowboys played guitars? Not many of them. Not on the job, anyway, despite what all those old B movies taught you.

A guitar is a fragile instrument. Banjos, like the short-necked Irish tenor I play, are more durable. They are also easier to come by.

One night, after a concert at the Peoria Library, a bunch of us went out to coffee at Denny’s. Miss Ellie thought I should not leave my historic tenor banjo on the back seat of the car.

It was, after all, the banjo that Shaggy Beanstrom was playing on that terrible night near …

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Look Out for Lurking Longnecks

This may be the nicest time of year to get out and see Arizona. The ice has long since broken up on the Santa Cruz River, and the days are getting warm.

Soon it will be summer, which is an even greater motive for getting out now. But now is its own incentive this year. Rains in January and February turned the desert a fresh green, decorated with gold and yellow flowers.

It’s a shame to spoil such a scene with warnings about the mean old longnecks, but I had to warn Miss Ellie the other day, and I need …

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